Monday, November 3, 2014

Insomnia Has a Way of Forcing You Out of Your Comfort Zone..

I have been dealing with a long bout of insomnia and trying just about everything out there to solve it.  I didn't like who I was becoming wandering around my home with next to zero sleep to speak of.  I have four children, three of which I homeschool so it's important for me to be on top of my game so to speak or things can quickly unravel and become utter chaos.  Friends and family suggested taking melatonin, magnesium and I tried them and they have provided some relief.  But I think the best suggestion I received was to take that awake time to pray, to earnestly pray and just seek God.

I probably should have started using that time in prayer but I thought I could just wait it out and everything would go back to normal and I'd be fine.  But the sleepless nights kept coming and my personality seemed to be deteriorating.   This was very unsettling and I desperately wanted to be more than just a waking, walking shell of a person merely surviving.  I did begin praying and my husband and I do a Bible study together each evening which began my road to recovery. 

I've been a Christian since March of 2001 and I've had highs and lows and this was becoming a pretty big low.  But God is faithful and reminded me of my value in Him.  People will always disappoint and fail us.  And I realized that perhaps I had put my trust fully on my family both close and extended and just the thought of losing one of them frightens me.  My thought was what would I be, how would I be if all of it was stripped away, no parents, no children, no spouse?  Would I be a blubbering mess with no hope left? I was afraid the answer was yes and I was lost but God reminded me that if I trust in Him and that if everything should be stripped of those things or people I hold dear, I would NEVER be without hope.  He could/can/ and is to be trusted.  He loves me warts and all and holds my life in His hands if I would just trust Him.

My plan then?  To walk closer with Him, to know Him better than what happens in facebook or in the news.  I want to live not just survive or go through the motions of living life.  God gives us life and He gives abundantly!

So welcome to this little place where I'd like to share experiences, thought and quotes that inspire me in my walk with God.

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